When parents send their toddler abroad

Article

Q. My practice sees immigrant families from all over the world. A number of Chinese families have one child (born in the US) and are here as graduate students or working in a technical field. Some of these families send their child back to China (usually in the second year of life) to live with the grandparents for a year or more, while the parents remain here to pursue their careers. What are the developmental consequences of this separation? And how should I counsel these families in preparation for it?

Joseph F. Terrizzi, MDEvanston, Ill.

A. The practice of sending children to live with grandparents is not unusual among graduate students from foreign countries, and it is not new. In the late 19th and early 20th centuries, American settlers who moved west would often send their children to live with grandparents or other relatives; many children did not see their parents for several years. Some cultures, such as those of certain tribes in Uganda, routinely send toddlers to live with grandparents, who often live some distance away.

Fortunately, in this technologic age, there are many ways for parents and children to keep in close contact. These include telephone calls, videophone calls, photos sent via email, and videotapes of the parents reading stories to, or singing to, the child. Grandparents should facilitate ongoing contact to make the eventual reunion less traumatic. Counseling of families should emphasize the importance of frequent visits, phone calls, photos, videotapes, etc. The parents should be told, however, that such separations may have negative psychological consequences for the child, depending on his or her personality.

Karen Olness, MD

Dr. OLNESS is professor of pediatrics, family medicine, and international health, Case Western Reserve University School of Medicine, Cleveland, Ohio

Recent Videos
Geetika Kennady, MD, FAAP
Jillian Cotter, MD
Jesse Hinckley, MD, PhD
Validating digital stethoscope for pediatric breath sounds, with Jennifer Nestor, MD
Decreasing antibiotics for acute otitis media and community acquired pneumonia, with Elysha Pifko, MD
Sensory play for children with autism, with Joshua Feder, MD
Stephanie Chao, MD
Feasibility of ambulatory blood pressure monitoring in primary care | Carissa Baker-Smith, MD, MPH
Tina Tan, MD
Camille Walker CPNP-PC, MSN, CPNP Sacheen D. Harris MSN, CPNP-PC
© 2025 MJH Life Sciences

All rights reserved.